# dirty math jokes

Why do analyists and number theorists like parks? Let's make our slopes zero (slope of zero means horizontal => bed) I hope you know set theory because I want to intersect you and union you. "I wish I was your differential because then I'd be touching all your curves." Baby let me be your integral so I can be the space under your curves The problem with math puns is that calculus jokes are all derivative, trigonometry jokes are too graphic, algebra jokes are usually formulaic, and arithmetic jokes are pretty basic. B equals T x N. I think you and I should study the T and N planes in depth What does the "B" in Benoit B Mandelbrot stand for?

What do you call a banana with a hole in the middle? What transform do you apply to turn a sphynx cat into a Norwegian forest cat? I'm not being obtuse, you are being acute girl. I wish I was your derivative so I could lie tangent to your curves And for more laughs, check out our favorite grammar jokes and science jokes. What is the contour integral around Africa? How can I know so many hundreds of digits of pi and not the digits of your How about we cut math and philosophy class and focus on You must be sin squared, because I'm cosin squared and together we equal one. You + Me = The number of sides in a Mobius Strip My ex-girlfriend is like the square root of -1,.... she's imaginary. T and N = osculating plane, which literally means the 'kissing' plane. You're as sweet at 3.14. How did the matrix whose eigenvalues summed to zero disappear? years, but you won't know the volume of mine until tonight. Baby, you're a 9.999999999...but you'd be a 10 if you were with me. What do group theorists hang on their door at Christmas? Are you a 30 degree angle? Meeting you is like a switch to polar coordinates: complex and imaginary My love for you is like the slope of a concave up function because it's always increasing. Funny Short Math Jokes and Puns, Math is Fun! What do analysts and number theorists throw into the fireplace? What did the calculus instructor say to his hungover student? Guy: Me neither...In fact, the only number I care about is yours. Baby your like a student and I am like a math book, you solve all my problems. Is that an asymptote in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me? I'll be the one over your cosx an baby, we can have secx! Would you care to normalize it? Let 'u' and 'i' be irrational integers such that a real non-monotonic relationship exists for all T = {0 ... infinity}, © The derivative of my love for you is 0, because my love for you is constant. If I was sin^2 theta and you were cos^2 theta together we would be 1

In Euclidean geometry two parallel lines never touch ... let's go back to my place and study some non-Euclidean geometry. Here's a list of math jokes.

Are you a 45 degree angle, Because your perfect. we've been differentiating for too long, lets sum it up and integrate Like a quantum computation, our paths are entangled. you and i add up better than a riemann sum Free Printable to Share With Families!

What is purple and all of its offspring have been committed to institutions? What do you call small, shiny disks which are made with precision? if (year<1900) {year+=1900} document.write(year); Girl: No. What is a pirate's favorite measure on a locally compact topological group? I'd like to be your math tutor for the night; add a bed, subtract your clothes, divide your legs and multiply! What is polite and works for the phone company? I'm good at math: add a bed, subtract our clothes, divide your legs, and multiply! Why do Maclaurin polynomials fit the original function so well? Almost all jokes are of the question-answer format.

the rest of Russell's life. Posted by Elizabeth Mulvahill. All rights reserved. Well, then, let's try it with your phone number.

How do algebraic topologists remodel their porch? for sexual liberation. Because seven eight nine! The volume of a general cylinder was known for thousands of years, but you won You and I must have the same natural frequency, because we resonate together. But I guess the occasional statistics joke is an outlier. injective. If I'm the Riemann zeta function, you must be s=1. I wish I was your secant line so I could touch you in at least two places! "You know", the son explains, "when I walked into the classroom the first day, and I saw that guy on the wall nailed to a plus sign, I knew one thing: This place means business!" I think that convex butts are ALWAYS better than concave butts..you look toned Your hottness is the only reason we can't reach absolute zero. Why did SO(3) leave Caltech after one week? 6 Armstrong Road | Suite 301 | Shelton, CT | 06484. What do you call an angle that is adorable? What do you call the category of Banach Analytical Manifolds? What do you call a destroyed angle that kinda looks like an equiangular quadrilateral? What? Hey baby, can i see what's under your radical? a series of simple periodic functions. The father is, of course, pleased, but wants to know: "Why are your math grades suddenly so good?" Have you heard about the mathematician who’s afraid of negative numbers? Follow-up: What fakes politeness and works for the phone company? e^x = f(u)^n.

What's your sine? The sine^(-1) of you must be pi/2 cause you're the one Updated: Oct 25, 2019. Huygens' favorite curves were cycloids, but my favorite curves are Why did the mathematician put his null space in the microwave?

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